How to Stop Half-Assing It

Posted on August 28, 2015 under Leadership, Mindset

Get Committed to Commitment

The important things in life require commitment to make them happen and keep happening. I'm talking about big goals like starting a business, getting an education, or raising a family.

In a perfect world we would get everything our way. If one of your personal values is freedom, flexibility, or variety, then having it your way might mean wanting multiple ways without selecting one best option.

But inevitably this buffet approach to living will eventually catch up with you and what you hold dear will start to crumble. The meltdown happens because giving less than 100% to a full-time priority is not sustainable.

You may think you're immune to this pending loss or you've got it all figured out. The sad part is most of us don't know until it's too late. However, it's usually obvious to everyone else around you that it was destined to fail.

Here's my personal story of half-assing an incredibly important commitment.

It was 2002 and I was sitting with my marriage counselor waiting for my then-husband to arrive for our session. I spent an hour staring at his empty chair before realizing that he was never going to show up.

Check out the reenactment of my couple's therapy session.

I was absolutely furious and used his “no-show” as evidence of how he literally wasn't there for me. That was when our counselor turned the tables on me and told me how I also wasn't committed to the marriage. I was aghast, offended, and had no idea of what she was talking about.

I quickly rattled off the million things I regularly did that I believed proved my commitment. I was the one there after all!! Sadly, none of my words or actions translated into commitment.

The truth was that I was living in my head and not in my heart. I was saying and doing the right things but I was dead inside without the feelings. Not listening to our heart is a tragic mistake for many of us.

You must be the vigilant guardian of your beloved priority and truly feel the value. You have to be all in or all out. Thinking your way through won't work.

Here's what heart-centered commitment looks like at work:

When You're the Boss